Monday, 22 June 2009

Scene 6

Scene 6: Outside Musketeer Headquarters

Porthos lets go of the TARDIS and stands back, patting his brow with a handkerchief. He walks around it and whistles.

Porthos: Monsieur Docteur, I…

(The Doctor coughs harshly)

Porthos: Doctor, I cannot credit it. When you showed me inside this monolith of yours, I expected it to weigh the same as Mont Blanc, and whilst it’s doesn’t weigh that much, it’s still enough to bring me, Porthos, the strongest man in France, into a sweat. Are you a great magician?

Doctor: Me? A magician? Now, don’t talk twaddle, Porthos. No, I’m just very good at making unusual things happen, that’s all!

(The other Musketeers ride in)

Doctor: Ah, Athos and Aramis, how was the news received?

Aramis: Very badly, Monsieur and with great concern. Are you sure that Spain is trying to influence France in some way?

Doctor: I’m not sure at the moment, but best to keep our guard up, eh?

(There is a fanfare and Treville’s carriage enters the courtyard. As Treville exits, the Musketeers and the Doctor bow. D’Artagnan also exits as well)

D’Artagnan: (modestly) Oh, now really. There’s no need to bow for me!

Treville: Gentlemen, Doctor, I have informed the King of the situation and he agrees that all leave should be cancelled. (The Musketeers frown) But, he has said that he will allow you one dispensation. He has granted you this evening off duty.

(The Musketeers cheer)

D’Artagnan: (pulling at Treville’s shirt) What about me, sir?

Treville: You too, D’Artagnan!

Porthos: May the Doctor come as well, sir?

Treville: Doctor?

Doctor: I don’t see why not, I shan’t be here for another 354 years.

Porthos: I know just the place to go. The Pomme du Pup!

(Athos starts licking his lips)

Athos: I can’t remember the last time I was there.

Aramis: No, but I’m sure that the staff can!

(The Musketeers laugh)

Aramis: Come on then, last one there pays the bill!

(Athos and Aramis mount up on their horses and D’Artagnan, Porthos and the Doctor climb into Treville’s coach and exit the courtyard)

Treville: (with a smile on his face) Gentlemen. Perfect Gentlemen!

(A servant approaches Treville)

Servant: Monsieur, the patient has now woken up and is asking for the Doctor!

Treville: Well, why are you asking me then?

Servant: He insists on seeing the Doctor, not a doctor.

Treville: (twigging) Ah, I see! (And he follows the servant to the infirmary)

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